It’s cliche but true. Plan all you want. Make up every To-Do list possible but the best laid plans are laid to rest. Don’t get me wrong. Planning in life is key. It’s the way you take the temperature of your life (Am I closer to where I want to be? Is this how I want my life to go?). Far too often, people live their lives in planning mode and get crushed when their beautiful, perfect plans don’t work out. What they fail to realize is that life isn’t about planning; it’s about living. Success isn’t about having a plan work out perfectly. Success is living victoriously, despite the plan not working. So… as a woman breadwinner, with so much on her plate, so much to consider, and even more to delegate, when a life storm hits, how do you respond?
Do you bend or do you break?
In a book called “The Gift of Change”, Marianne Williamson states the following:
“I’ve noticed in myself that if something small and ultimately meaningless has gone wrong – I can’t find the file I left on top of my desk, my daughter failed to do what I asked her to do before going to a friend’s house- I can easily get rattled. But if someone calls to inform me of a serious difficulty- someone has been in an accident, or a child is in trouble- I notice a profound stillness come over me as I focus on the problem. In the former case, my temptation to become frantic does not attract solutions, but rather hinders them. There is nothing in my personal energy that invites help from others, nor do I have the clarity to think through what I need to do next. In the latter case, however, all of my energy goes toward a higher level of problem-solving: my heart is in service to others, and my mind is focused and clear. When I am at the effect of the problem, I become part of the problem. When I am centered within myself, I become part of the solution. And that phenomenon, multiplied many times over, is the foce that will save the word. When things in the world are troubling, our need is not to join the chaos, but to cleave to the peace within. The only way to gain power in a world that is moving too fast is to learn to slow down.”
Marianne speaks to exact qualities that separate the women breadwinners who bend when life storms hit from the women breadwinners who break.
How do you become the one who bends and flows when life storms hit?
Here are 3 ways:
1) When a life storm hits, get quiet. Go within. Give yourself at least 24 hours to allow the initial anxiety, frustration, worry and panic to subside. In 99% of all situations, you AT LEAST have 24 hours to consider your options. Give yourself that time.
2) Get centered within yourself. Remind yourself how powerful you are. Remind yourself that you are the solution, not the problem. Use affirming self talk that returns you to a place of power, a place from which you can craft creative and resourceful solutions.
3) Expect to receive ample support. The Universe will support you if you believe it. People will say ‘Yes’ to your needs if you ask. There are AT LEAST 1,000 ways to get any one thing done. Do not give up on finding a solution until you have LITERALLY tried 999 things.
At the end of the day, life storms will come. Decide in advance that no matter what happens, you will still be the last woman standing. What you believe becomes true for you EVERY time…